COACHING: Accomplish more than you thought possible.

To this day the person who made the biggest impact on my life was my father. He was a true coach and mentor. His style was simple yet powerful in the way he always engage in really listening to what I had to say. Giving critical feedback, implementing possibilities not yet recognize and then sending me out to accomplish my goals.

He knew I was born with a reading disability, yet he always encouraged me to improve where I could, be proud of who I truly was and take my assets to the next level. Yes, there were set backs, things not accomplished the way others thought they should be. Through his mentorship I learned a little bit about picking myself and brushing myself off. However, these first lessons were learned when I fell off a horse, or was crushed under the weight of a cow when it backed me up against the fence.  At the age of 13 my father insisted that I learn the game of golf. I found it to be a love hate relationship. The game itself was fun, but the physical and mental pressure to improve your score was difficult.

To improve, one must master the physical game along with the mental attributes. Being out on the golf course with my father he took every opportunity to coach, encourage me and even got in my face at time or two. As a great father he helped me through understanding that any goal worth pursuing is worth the work to get there. During our rounds of golf, he consistently mentored me in the game of life using golf as an example. He would say things like:

Everyone out here has some form of weakness just like you. Find your own strong points and gain the advantage from where you come from.

Mentally you will be challenged. Learn to strengthen this muscle. But remember, to always take a break or step back to gain perspective. Do not wait too long for if you procrastinate you will loose.

Listen to your heart, it will keep you balanced when your sense of right and wrong, your ethical true north is challenged.

It was not until my adult life started to unfold that I totally understood why my father instilled in me that I can accomplish more than my initial thinking allows me.  You just need to start.

True to form, hiring a coach to mentor you through accomplishing your goals is one of the best things you can do for yourself. Listening, accountability, focus, and celebrating your wins is what its all about.

Just as in the world of sports every aspiring athlete benefits from coaching, so people are realising that the decision to work with a life or business coach indicates an inner commitment to expanding your comfort zone and choosing to create your own goals in life or career.

If you would like to experience the exciting, challenging and fulfilling coaching process, please contact me for your free coaching session.

Barbara

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Unraveling the Mysteries of EFT-Tapping

Emotional Freedom Techniques also known as Tapping has been ushered in like a lion. My prediction is that it will not go out like a lamb. This energy healing technique maybe unique, but it consistently works.

EFT has been in existence for almost 20 years and due to the abundance of research there is sound evidence that it truly works in healing negative emotional connections to our well being, joy, physical bodies and achieving goals that were locked behind walls and self-sabotage.

If you would like to know more about EFT – Tapping, why and under what circumstances it works, as well as clearing up some of the myths surrounding it, then please join me for a free one hour presentation on EFT.

Wednesday, May 23rd, 8:00 – 8:45 am or Wednesday, June 6th, 5:30 – 6:30 pm. The Fisher Building, 16701 SE McGillivray Blvd, Ste 215, Vancouver, WA  98683. (360) 921-4471.

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Three Simple Steps to Eliminating Irrational Behavior and Live in Integrity.

Irrational behavior stems from being out of alignment with one’s own value system. Living in integrity is one of the most import things you can do to bring clarity, balance, and abundance. This generates a greater path to relating or communicating openness to tolerance, knowledge, understanding, honor, and love into your life.

To help understand why you might be expressing irrational behavior ask yourself the following questions:

1.  What labels are attached to me (warranted/unwarranted)? Do I represent them (positive/negative) in manner.  Are they true?  What does the world see when it looks at me? This labeling of one’s self is comprised of several elements, sub-elements, or parts.  They include behavior, your public self (what I show others), and your private self. This is a core part of our belief system about ourselves.

2. What is the real me, the core of who I am (not the presentation of me).  This would be the self, spirit part of you.  Your inner being.

3. What values drive my behavior?  This is about how and why I do the things I do.

Once you write out your answers to the above questions notice what negative emotional charge comes from any of them. Negative charges are what cause us to behave in sometimes the most irrational ways. By understanding labels that we try to live each day with we start to understand just how powerful a belief in ourselves – warranted or unwarranted drives our own behavior and expectations that are not our own. By removing these negative charges you start to re-align yourself with the true you and live in integrity and balance.

There are 8 applications to empower, honor, and value yourself and others. Over the next 8 weeks we will be exploring them. You will need a little courage on your part to create a more fulfilled life by working through all eight applications. Once you do, you will wonder why you lived so long in feeling sad, depressed, anxious, or showing unwarranted irrational behavior.

Barbara Hilkey

Empowerment Coach

EFT Practitioner

Author of “Keys to Success, One Key at a Time”.

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I Dare You

Let me tell you a story…

During my graduation ceremony the principal handed me my diploma then he challenged me.  He stood there in front of a full auditorium and said, “I Dare You”. “I dare you to reach for the stars and in doing so, love with passion, always lend a helping hand, and trust in yourself.  Barbara, I dare you to be interesting, to be interested in others, and be enthusiastic to reach your goals.” Then he handed me a little book titled, I Dare You, by William H. Danforth, Founder and former Chairman of the Board, Ralston Purina Company, St. Louis, Missouri. Twenty-Fifth Edition, January, 1974.

Danforth was fully engaged in his prominent words in challenging others to aspire nobly, adventure daringly and to serve humbly in whatever you set out to do. I can guarantee you since the first publication of this powerful little book it has never made the top 10 list. But I can also guarantee you that if you were to read William H. Danforth’s book, you would be so inspired to move forward and accept his dare to create a life to be lived to its fullest.

Mr. Danforth wrote “I Dare You” for the daring few who are headed somewhere. He tells us that his book will not be over-popular because it calls for courage. Does this sound familiar? Probably not. Most motivational speakers of his day glaze over this important fact. A very important fact in stepping out of one’s comfort zone and making goals come to fruition.

If I could, I would thank William Danforth personally for daring me to take my talents, passions, and dreams and step forward into the unknown with courage to achieve the full richness of life. His book, no matter how many times I have read it still instills me with passion to keep embracing life, to recognize my core true character and leadership qualities. Through out the book he encouraging us to lead creative, purposeful lives by developing our own talents and capacities to the utmost.

In whatever you are striving to achieve, or gain clarity on, this is a perfect place to begin your journey.  To eliminate any obstacles facing you today.

Just like William H. Danforth, I will help you to rediscover your passion and to dare you to take the challenge to aspire nobly, adventure daringly and to serve humbly.

I want to thank you for visiting my blog. I am here because a dream was dreamed and I fulfilled the dare that was given to me many years ago. I hope I can provide you with the same courage because I dare you to dream your dream and make it happen.

Due to the abundance I have received, I would like to give you Part I of my Being Happy training seminar FREE. It has brought into my own life more happiness than I ever thought possible and I want to share it with you.  If you really want lasting happiness today, I recommend you follow the steps provided. Apply the principals of BEING HAPPY and simply enjoy what life will bring you.

Carpe Diem!

Barbara Hilkey                                                                                                          Life Empowerment Coach                                                                                                              EFT  Practitioner

BEING HAPPY – Is there a handbook for that? Part I

Some of the little things you can do for yourself will make the biggest impact on your life.  As we all know, happiness is a state of being.  It can come from many places.  We will only focus on one of the five areas where you can pull happiness into your life starting today.

Focus area number I

Give Your Self-image a Check Up

Our self-image is a blue print of how we behave, who we associate with, and what we will avoid.  Our every thought and action stems from the way we see ourselves.  We create our own quality of life, based on our own ‘happiness’ self image.

The picture we have of ourselves is colored by our experiences, our success and failures, the thoughts we have had about ourselves, and other people’s reactions to us.  We decide on our own self-worth and how much happiness to expect.

Work through the following exercise and application. Repeat as often as necessary.

Exercise and Application:

  • Change the way you think and talk about yourself. Always speak well of yourself.  Acknowledge your value.
  • Recognize compliments paid to you.  Successful people always say, “Thank you”.
  • Create ways to surround yourself with self-love.  This allows you to respect your own wishes as well as other. Remember, being egotistical and having a healthy self-love are complete opposites.
  • Feel proud of your achievements without needing to broadcast them.
  • Treat yourself and others with respect. No one can make you fell inferior without your consent.
  • Realize that some of your behavior is not connected to your self-worth.  If you happen to break something, it doesn’t make you a bad person.  You simply made a mistake.
  • Think good thoughts of yourself and gravitate towards them.  Use affirmations to change your inner negative voice.

I hope these simple steps help you create happiness within yourself.

Barbara Hilkey

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Follow Your Heart

“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending”, Maria Robinson

When I ask you to follow your heart what comes to mind?  What are the first things that leap at you, positive or negative?  For most people they first think of family or their job.

I’m a firm believer that understanding oneself, and obtaining those things that truly make ua happy are the most important for or health, wealth, and our spiritual wellbeing.  I start my lecture out by asking the audience to write down what brings or fills their heart with  glee, happiness, joy, fulfillment, a sense of peace, or prosperity.

Many of us have an idea of what we want, but not truly knowing what we want.  If you do not know what you want, figure out what is the closet thing to it and start there. Remember, this is about you and what you want, not what you think other people think you want for yourself.

There will be items on your list that you will not be able to change and there will be items you can. If you are trying to become happier, then the first thing to do is change or adjust your attitude. For instance, perhaps your job is not the best, but it’s not the worse either. By choosing your attitude you can enjoy any job. If you work at something you love, you’ll be happier.

The true key to being honestly and openly happy is to know that your life will only work when you take full responsibility for it.  If you are having troubles finding passion in what you are doing, then start clearing up some of the clutter in your life.  Remove some of the toleration you put up with which opens up space for those things you want to do and have passion about.  If you feel you have lost that part of you, start by listening to your inner voice when you do something.

Following your heart and doing what you want to do is not a guarantee that your life will be easy.  In fact, it becomes more challenging, interesting, life provoking ‘aha’ moments happen.  For the most part, you fall in love with life again.

When you do the things you love to do a shift will transpire. You will start caring about the thing you do and your enthusiasm will carry you through anything you are faced with.  When you are ‘being happy’ your passion rises to the top and no one has to motivate you.

To get started to a happier you I recommend applying the following 9 applications to your life;

  1.  Have courage.
  2.   Try new things-what is the worst that can happen?
  3.  Clear out your tolerations-free up your time and energy by removing people, things, situations that drain you.
  4.  Take on an attitude of gratitude-being thankful is pure joy in your heart.
  5.  Live in the present.
  6.  Let go of those things you can not change.
  7.  Stop worrying.
  8.  Practice forgiveness of yourself, and those around you.
  9.  Learn to love yourself.  When you do this, you stop criticizing not only yourself, but others.

*** We are happiest when we are helping others people with their lives.

***We are loneliest when our principle goal is our own personal security.

***Practice Mindfulness.

Repeat often.

To learn more about how to change your life, or getting tools on empowerment check back often.

Barbara

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